Here’s my list:
- jumped through a window (and taken to the ER with several stitches)
- almost died of acute appendicitis (two weeks in ICU)
- attacked by three German Shepherds in my life (two of them at one time)
- have had three knee surgeries (cist removed, ACL, ACL re-repair)
- tore my ACL while dancing to a Michael Jackson video while preparing to go on visitation for the church I was pastoring at the time (anyone who dances to a Michael Jackson video deserves this same fate)
- gotten into 9 car accidents behind the wheel (and only one ticket through all 9 incidents!)
- ran out of gas on the top of a volcano in a minivan with my family
- about choked to death on a piece of butterscotch candy
- fell off a the top of a ladder into a hot tub on a snowy day in Colorado
- angered a bull moose in the wild to the point of it tearing a tree to shreds with it’s antlers and marking it’s territory while I revv’ed my ATV engine to make it more angry (okay I deserved to get charged on this one!)
- choked a dog that was trying to attack me while I was going door to door inviting people out to my church
- preached a sermon while wearing a suit that still had the price tag dangling from my sleeve for all to see
- got in a fight while at Colorado Christian University that took us both rolling down a set of stairs to the lower level of the educational building during school hours while students and teachers passed by (NOTE: Don’t fight dudes who take steroids! On second thought, don’t fight!)
- stumbled upon two hundred nude protesters in London all riding bikes, stopping traffic and screaming slogans (a memory I’m still trying to erase but a sure cure for lust!)
- Was abandoned in a Muslim village by my interpreter in the middle of the night. Our car was surrounded by angry Muslims and I began to joke with them in English, a language they didn’t understand. I think they thought I was crazy. Imagine that. But that perceived insanity could have saved my American life.
- Pulled the tail of a lion and had it roar in my face (maybe that’s why they won’t let me back in the Cheyenne Mountain Zoo)
- Was in the Today show audience and got on television four times.
- Watched in horror as my son pulled the fire alarm at the airport when he was two and a half years old
- Was backyard certified to go Scuba diving (and went) although I can’t swim
- Was in a California earthquake.
- etc. etc. etc.
I thank God that I’m alive. He must have some kind of plan for my life. He’s got one for your’s too!
Stayin’ Alive
