1. When the pastor asks you what you thought of his sermon say, “Honestly, I’ve heard better.”
2. Use the church baptismal for a cannonball contest for middle schoolers.
3. Finally give that one cantankerous elder a piece of your mind.
4. Start trying to implement a Gospel Advancing youth ministry philosophy in a purely attractional or full on dysfunctional church.
5. Get a ticket for going 20 MPH over the speed limit in the church van while attempting to make it back to the church on time after your Fall Retreat.
6. Use the pastor’s headset to preach to the teenagers. He won’t mind.
7. Promote your next youth group series, “Don’t fight naked” (on spiritual warfare), then put the web banner on your church website’s homepage.
8. Say things like, “Receipts? I don’t have any” to the church treasurer.
9. Have a “Pyro night” in the church basement.
10. Turn “Youth Sunday” into an original musical that uses zombies, re-written songs from Grease and the book of Revelation. End with explosions.
By the way, if Jesus was a youth leader do you think he’d get fired? Check out my book Firing Jesus and see my answer to that question.
