10 Ways NOT to share the Gospel this Thanksgiving

Greg Stier
Greg Stier

1.  When nobody’s looking hide Gospel tracts in the body cavity of the turkey (along with the stuffing.) When your guests discover them act surprised and call it a miracle.

2.  Start the Thanksgiving prayer by saying, “Lord, bless the food on the table and save the sinners around it.” 

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3.  Dress up like a pilgrim and run amok at the shopping mall while handing out King James Version Bibles to everyone who will take one. Be sure to out run the mall cops who will be chasing you.

4.  Use a whip cream canister to spray John 3:16 on the pumpkin pie.

5.  On Thanksgiving Day dress up like a turkey and twirl a sign at a busy intersection that reads, “I’m ready to die today. Are you?” 

6.  Put in a Veggietales DVD right in the middle of the football game.

7.  Instead of going around the table and having everyone share something they’re grateful for, have everyone answer the question, “On a scale from 1-10 how sure are you of your eternal salvation and why?”

8.  Instead of inviting your neighbors to a “Turkey Bowl” football game at a nearby park invite them to an old fashioned “sword drill” Bible quiz competition in your living room. 

9.  Begin dinner with these words, “This turkey gave his life for us and so did someone else….”

10. Infuse the cranberry sauce with a habanero extract. When your guests respond to the extreme heat say something like, “That’s nothing compared to the hotness of hell.”

Of course this blog post is a joke 🙂 Please DON’T do any of the above ten suggestions.

How about this? How about you start a conversation with someone this Thanksgiving by asking them what they are most thankful for this season. When they ask you say something like, “I’m thankful for so many things but what I’m most thankful for is my relationship with Jesus Christ.” Then let the conversation flow like Thanksgiving gravy!

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